Ready to have kids? Don’t.
Couples all over America are considering unprotected sex tonight. Men and women, caught up in daydreams about her nose and his eyes on a brand-new, beautiful human being. They are perusing parenting books, hoping for inspiration and overpopulation statistics that are far less depressing than what they’ve found on the Internet.
You know the type.
She wants a girl because “Alannah” hasn’t been taken by anyone in the family yet. He wants a boy because he’d like to show his dad it’s possible to parent a child properly, without calling him a fag every time he cries.
To all the prospective parents out there looking for a reason to add another person to the planet, I am now going to talk you out of it.
Hey you, with the wistful look in your eye and baby on the brain. It only looks easy. You’re obsessed with cute little outfits, baby names that mean Sunshine in Hebrew, and which stroller goes best with your designer bag. But what happens in sixteen years when Junior comes out of the closet and pierces his nipples or Princess gets herpes the weekend after her Purity Ball?
What? You hadn’t planned that far? No kidding.
…read more at Ether Books.
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Disproportionately blessed...
Catherine Durkin Robinson
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I’m here to pee all over this Cheerio bowl of knowledge you’re serving here: having a kid is one of the best things – check that – THE best thing I’ve ever done. Hard? Yes. Exhausting? Yes. Trying? Oh yeah. But my kid is awesome, and it’s worth everything I’ve gone through. My equally awesome wife agrees (and as the one that had to carry that sucker for 9 months, I would defer to her if her opinion was opposed to mine).
Of course, we weren’t kidding ourselves about how difficult it would be. We just didn’t let that stop us.
Before you have kids you just assume they will be awesome and excellent little miniature versions of yourself. You also are pretty sure you will be the best parent EVER! of course once you have them you realize they are their own person and have ideas of their own. — I will say this they teach you about Love and expand that knowledge for you exponentially. I always say having kids is WAY better than I thought it would be but also that it SUCKS way worse as well….
Did you see Hot Tube Time Machine this weekend or something?
Kate, you are one of the best parents I know, yes, you have children, and yet you wrote this. I find that extremely cool. You are right to say what you said, and nowhere did you say anything about you and Marc regretting having them, or anything along those lines. Nice! xoxo