Purity balls: weird sex talk, disturbing pre-teen ritual, or both?
I have two little boys and love their rough and tumble ways – it suits me. No idea what I’d do with a daughter. In general, girls scare me with their Barbie dolls and princess parties. I don’t even know how to braid hair. As a teacher, female students repelled with low self-esteem and emotional [...]
How you can tell the summer trip is over before it starts
Nothing frightens parents more than summer vacation. Kids look forward to a few months of fun and frolic. Moms and dads wonder how they can fill ten hours a day with activities when there’s nothing good on television. One way to fill the time is to take a summer trip. This is what my family [...]
If you must have children, an argument for cleansing and doing it right
When I look at my precious ten year-old sons, I marvel at their innocence and beauty. I let my finger trace clusters of freckles near their noses. I gently brush back unruly, brown hair, with enviable red highlights, and kiss the softest skin around their eyes. Then I usually thank God they are finally asleep. [...]
Ready to have kids? Don’t.
Couples all over America are considering unprotected sex tonight. Men and women, caught up in daydreams about her nose and his eyes on a brand-new, beautiful human being. They are perusing parenting books, hoping for inspiration and overpopulation statistics that are far less depressing than what they’ve found on the Internet. You know the type. [...]
Home sweet home
Back in 1996, less than a year into our marriage, my husband and I desperately needed a change. Our hometown suddenly seemed old and inadequate. We wanted to escape suburbia and live somewhere exciting. We packed up everything we owned and never looked back, saying goodbye to Tampa without a single tear. Goodbye unbearable heat! [...]
Toilet humor: How to survive the hemoccult experience
I have always hated poop. My mother told me I started complaining about stinky diapers when I was six months old. Before my first birthday, I’d had enough of sitting in my own filth. I got undressed, grabbed a newspaper, climbed up on that porcelain throne, and became a “big girl.” Fast forward thirty years, [...]
Weekend observations, plus a plug or two
I usually spend my weekends knee-deep in dirty laundry and sports-related injuries. Sometimes a bit of excitement finds its way in, like that time I emptied my son’s school supplies and screamed because a Ziploc bag, filled with the contents of an owl pellet, looks a lot like weed. Factor in at least a half-hour [...]
How I give back/Advice that works – One way to save your sanity when spouse or children annoy
Sometimes, when I get annoyed or angry, Husband will walk me over to a picture from his brother’s bar mitzvah. This is an old picture, circa 1970. Husband points at a little boy who’s wearing a brown suit, no more than two years of age, standing in front of the crowd. The toddler’s chocolate brown [...]
How to prepare for guests who don’t agree with what you say, think, or do…but love you anyway
Friends are like the sweet cream frosting on top of a red velvet cake; they make everything that’s already good even that much more delicious. And then they induce a bowel movement. But they are so worth the trouble, no? As I’ve often said, I look for mutual adoration in every relationship. That’s the best [...]
Who has time between flag football and allergy outbreaks to answer chain emails?
Dear Lovely Readers, Sometimes, when checking my email account, I find messages from Facebook friends and immediately regret joining that destroyer of time and good taste. Creating an account under my real name was a bad call; not only do I have to defend old pictures and what I was thinking at the time (“Coloring [...]
Disproportionately blessed...
Catherine Durkin Robinson
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