I can’t believe I beat the girl who writes about anonymous sex
I won Best Female Contributor for Creative Loafing. Thanks to my readers for their support and haters for their motivation.
A special shout-out to my lovely balcony and orchestra – let’s face it, without tits and ass, I’d have no conservative audience.
Every little bit helps.
My kids were reading the list in Creative Loafing’s Best of the Bay edition and remarked that Tony Dungy won Best Local Hero.
“That’s ridiculous,” I said. “A Tampa police officer was killed in the line of duty. Cpl. Mike Roberts died protecting the residents of this community. Tony Dungy’s claim to fame involves getting a group of overpaid infants to run a ball over a line in the grass. No contest as far as I’m concerned. Jesus. What group of fools would vote for Dungy over a police officer?”
Long pause.
“The same people who voted for you, Mommy.”
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Disproportionately blessed...
Catherine Durkin Robinson
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Olive Garden won for best Italian restaurant. That doesn’t mean I don’t think you’re awesome and that you don’t deserve it. It also doesn’t mean I don’t like free refills of salad and breadsticks.
[...] at the reception and writes “Use birth control” on the commemorative plaque. Catherine wins Best Female Contributor at Creative Loafing, beating out the lady who writes about group sex and the Soccer Mom who writes [...]