Actions and Words Speak Louder Than Nonsense

Is anyone else sick of commercials insinuating a woman's love can be bought? Ask around. Most women I know would rather a good, stiff bone job over a vacuum cleaner any day of the week.

Emphasis on the *good*.

Two thumbs up for anything that pokes fun at our rampant overconsumption and commercialization. Whether such parody takes the form of a movie or humorous print ad.

Which leads me to this week's theme. (No, not your wife's fat ass. That's next week's theme.)

Here goes: The best way to celebrate the birth of your Lord, the miracle of lights, the new year or life in general is to show some gratitude toward the people we care about.

It really is as simple and as difficult as that.

Gifts are okay, but to be made to feel like we *have* to get the most expensive presents for children, spouses, etc. is ridiculous. Come on, our love is better than that.

If you, like me, have difficulty saying "I love you" to more than, like, maybe three people on the planet - that's okay. There are other ways to show our compassion, gratitude, and love without making everyone feel all awkward and shit.

We can
--write thank-you notes for all the gifts, thoughtful comments, and uplifting sentiments bestowed on us this year. Let the people who take time out to shower us with affection know that it means something.
--give extra-long kisses and hugs.
--send a friend a funny link that reminds us of them. Let them know that in the noisy confusion of life, they crossed our minds.
--call just to check in. (In our family, we call it a love check.)
--send an email or card when birthday time rolls around.
--say we're sorry. And mean it.
--bake some cookies for the person who delivers our mail, teaches our kids, takes away our trash, deposits our money, or cleans our homes.
--post a comment or write a letter of encouragement to someone who patrols our neighborhood, writes our favorite column, or blogs our favorite site.
--vote.
--call the customer complaint line and compliment.
--send holiday cards to everyone and their mother.

Not just once a year, either. As often as possible. I would say once a month, but we can't all roll like me.

I got this email yesterday from a reader I've never heard from before: "I have loved reading your wit and wisdom over the last year. So fresh and alive. Keep up the great work."

Twenty-one words that probably took less than a minute to write and click Send.

And yet it made my day.

Never underestimate the power of a kind word or action. Love rockets through the universe and comes back to us in ways we never imagined. And even if the person we reach out to doesn't return our affections - do it anyway. I used to think that the fewer people I loved, the more special those precious few would feel. What bullshit. As I get older, I realize my heart is big enough to include so many people. People I'd rather not live without. So take it from me - those who close themselves off emotionally need love just as much as anyone else. And eventually they'll get their heads out of their ass. I did anyway.

I'm grateful for each and every family member and friend. Lucky to have them all. And I take great comfort knowing that I've shared my love, in one way or another, with each and every one. Even if they didn't realize it at the time.

Look at that list again. You're in there somewhere. And probably more than a few times.

None of my above ideas are as great as a good, stiff bone job.

Emphasis on the *good*.

But my ideas are better than a giftwrapped piece of nonsense. Nonsense that is so soon and easily forgotten.

Happy New Year.